SOMETIMES I JUST FEEL LIKE I HAVE NOTHING TO GIVE.
I could continue to praise God for His faithfulness to me, but you’ve all heard me do that so much, it just feels like I’m a broken record.
Things aren’t going badly.
Actually, life is pretty good right now.
But I still feel dry.
Could it be that I am focused on the wrong thing? What I don’t have?
I don’t have words from God to give you encouragement.
But maybe He has words to do what I cannot do.
Yes. That is something I do have.
Today’s verse in my Bible App is Matthew 10:39 NLT
“If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it.”
That’s a scripture that was misused against me and many others during my time in the cult. It was a scripture that justified cutting off family members and those who didn’t agree.
When in reality, those are words of truth that I continue to walk in everyday life.
When I get an attitude about someone who doesn’t clean up after themselves and leaves a mess for me to clean up, I hear Him whisper in my ear, “Yep, and don’t I clean up your messes?”
When my heart judges someone’s spending habits because they have many outstanding bills they seem to be ignoring, I hear Him whisper in my heart, “And you’ve never done the same thing?”
When I feel overwhelmed with email to answer after being gone for 8 days and team members interrupt me with a question. My first response is irritation, I have things to do, emails to answer, delete or redirect, I don’t have time for this! But deep down I feel the love of Christ that looks someone in the eye and says “I have time for you, no matter what else is going on.” It overflows inside me and pushes aside the “life” I am trying to cling to. The life of productivity and achievement. The life of being too busy with the tyranny of the urgent to pay attention to living, breathing people who deserve my time and care.
Holding life as we know it in an open hand. Knowing He is sovereign and will allow trials to refine us and grow us and conform us into the image of Christ. This is giving up our lives for Him so that we might find life.
Sometimes the trials are small. Sometimes gigantic. Whatever comes, Lord. I choose to trust that You are working all things together for good because I love You and am called according to Your purpose. (Romans 8:28)
Lord, when I’m empty and dry, and feeling inadequate to do what You’ve called me to do, help me to always remember You are the One with the words I need. You are the One with the answers I seek. You are the Still, Small Voice who gently whispers to me as I travel through peaks and valleys, deserts and oceans, long dark nights and bright sunny days. Whether I’m feeling discouraged, defeated and disillusioned, or full of anticipation for the future…You are right there walking with me, comforting me, loving me, nurturing me, teaching me.
Thank You, Lord. For Who You are, for all that You have done, and all that You have planned for my life, and the lives of those around me, those who read this blog, those who call You Lord and even those who shake their fist at You. Thank You, Lord, for wooing us, for drawing us, for never letting us go.
You are worthy.
You are mighty.
You are faithful.
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