Returning home after a whirlwind trip to Grand Rapids, Michigan for Carol Kent’s Speak Up Conference has found me ready for an extended quiet time without interruption. I realized my journal was in my 2nd suitcase still in the car, so I grabbed another journal thinking I could use that instead. As I began looking through it, I felt compelled to read the first entry from February 24, 2023.

My prayer from Tozer’s Deeper Life:

O God, glorify Thyself at my expense. Send me the bill – anything, Lord. I set no price. I will not dicker or bargain. GLORIFY THYSELF. I’ll take the consequences. Amen.

I had to linger with that as I considered all that He has done in the last 5 months since I scribbled that prayer in my journal. As I continued to read, the weight of His grace brought new conviction and praise for what He has already done in my heart through this encounter.

My entry continued on:

And I commit to the following 5 Vows from Tozer’s Deeper Life:

#1 – DEAL THOROUGHLY WITH SIN –
Name it, confess it, repent of it, and allow God (and trust Him) to deliver me from it.

Lord, may Your Holy Spirit always bring conviction that moves me toward repentance.

 

#2 – NEVER OWN ANYTHING –
My body is Your, my family is Yours, my marriage/husband is Yours, the ministry You’ve given me and the story of Your work in my life is Yours, and Redemption Press IS YOURS. My car, house, reputation, future – everything Lord is Yours!

Lord, I choose to give you everything.

 

#3 – NEVER DEFEND YOURSELF –
“But if you will listen carefully to his voice and do everything I say, I will be an enemy to your enemies and a foe to your foes.” (Exodus 23:22) –

Lord, I choose to be silent when attacked and will allow You to defend me.

 

#4 – NEVER PASS ANYTHING ON ABOUT ANYBODY ELSE THAT WILL SLANDER HIM –
If I want God to be good to me, I am going to have to be good to His children.

“O, Lord! Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord, keep watch over the door of my lips, that I might not be drawn into what is evil.” (Psalm 141:3-4)

 

#5 – NEVER ACCEPT ANY GLORY –
The Lord gave up His reputation and so must I. I must determine that I will never take any glory but see that God gets it all.

“O Lord, may I be so sensitive to Your Spirit that any time I begin to accept glory that belongs only to You, that You would immediately remind me of David’s prayer – Keep me from lying to myself.” (Psalm 119:29 NLT)

 

Making these vows introduces the cross into my life – they strike at the heart of my self-life!

My journal pages went on with specific ways I’d sinned in these areas.

WOW.

 

So grateful He used these entries to remind me of how He has been answering each one of these prayers! And then to consider this last week at SpeakUp where women from across the country gathered to grow in their craft of speaking and/or writing – a calling that so easily entices us to accept the glory that only God deserves. This quote spoken from the SpeakUp platform sums it up well…

 

Are you willing to pray for a heart for lost people
rather than a platform?”
-Lee Nienhuis

 

Walking out our calling as we pray for a heart for lost people rather than a platform will do much to enable us to keep these vows to our faithful Savior.

The vow I struggle with most is #3. I know I hate being misunderstood so my default is to defend myself and I must fight against that impulse.

Of the 5 vows listed, which has been the one you’ve struggled with most? I’d love to be able to pray for you about that!

 

Thanks for hanging out with me today!
Athena